ish.....if had a 'most frustrating week' list, this week will rank high. its not just the assignments. well, lets just start with that.
my assignments are sky rocketing and i only have 6 weeks more to complete EVERYTHING!. the everything which includes:
1) 2 watercolour paintings, 1 poster colour, 1 marker rendering (distortion) of which i have yet to choose a picture, distort it and get it aproved, and there's still 2 more to come!!
2) i've got a dress pattern to complete and the dress to sew. imagine, i took 8 weeks to complete my 1st dress..now i only have 6, and its just my 2nd dress! prolly need to find the accessorries (gulp..more money!!) and find a model for the presentation.
3) then there's this whole business management research on abercrombie. honestly, i think i'm the laziest in the group. christina's done her part, sabira and tania should be almost done too. me? i'm only 5% started! i feel so bad each time she ask me about it...
4) next is a pants to sew. well at least this wan got progress la, but super slow.
5) history journal..haih. i haven't started. ish. all these research punya work so annoying.
last saturday i auditioned for christmas. a morning to learn a whole dance proves too much for my brain. i learn too slowly..always. hmh...i screwed the auditions yet again. so dissapointing.
then there was Tuesday. the day i burnt a whole in my pocket. the day i dissapointed my parents badly. i still feel bad, still feel the tears welling when i think of Tuesday.
and yesterday, i broke my contact lens. yea, i know..like WHAT??! i think i didn't place the left side of the contacts properly and it slipped out into the container into the storing liquid. and as i was trying to take it out i prolly broke it then. (mine's semi hard lense) somehow i almost always only think of the better solution after things happen. ish...dunnoe how to tell my parents. dun even know whether to tell them anot. ish..have to spend money again. another 100+ will fly away. (must so go and work this holidays!)
then there's friends that unknowingly dissapoint you. small matters but they do count. what's worst? i can't and don't know how to tell them that.
ugh!!!!!!..............
Saturday, May 3, 2008
somehow each time i get the chance to feel extra independent i feel someone else is just trying to get me into trouble. earning my own money for the 1st time felt so good, i was so happy i thought i could cover the cost of the fabric already. nay. instead the fabric cost almost double what i earned. why? cos i dunnoe how to go to the shop selling cheaper jeans material. annd....me and mahsa made many dumb mistakes. non-street wise ppl. we could have taken the e1 bus (we were on it) right up to central market, instead we stopped at central kl and got cheated of 8 bux for the ride to central market. then, when going back, she could have waited for e1 at cm instead of going back to central, missing the bus (the bus just left right when we arrived) and waiting for another 40 minutes and me could have taken the bus straight to midvalley instead of dropping at central, pay more money and take the train to midvalley. ish..
after the interview at midvalley pulak, my 2 joker friends ( namely margaret and robin) decided to wait in hunger for me and stef to finish..that was at 9+. yes..and so we ate then. gosh, what if we had eaten and wanted to go back straightaway,,,st_p_d!!!!!! i was rushing to get to the ktm by 10pm cos the last train to subang is at 11 and its ktm ler....tau tau la. manatau the train to midvalley tergendala 3 freaking times!! the train only arrived at like wat, 10.50 something. i reached central at 11.05. needless to say, the last train gone di lar. my mind went into panic mode when i saw the sign...next train..
5.15
and to top it all i only had 2 cents in my phone, 30 cents coins in my wallet and no one had enough coins to change for a dollar note. i was stranded!!!!
i called my dad and next thing i heard was shouting. he was like " so now how?..WALK HOME LA!!'. he asked me to find a way back first before he came. and thats what i did. i went out just in time to catch the last rapid kl to subang.but since i couldn't call him, i messaged my sis to get him to call me asap. well, that took a while and when he called the bus moved off already..with me inside. And the worst thing was he said he was nearby already!.. that thought did strike when i entered the bus, but panic clouded my mind and i dismissed that innervoice.
all through the bus ride, i was either trying to hold back tears or deciding in my mind whether to prepare my defence or just let them scold. well, i did deserve it in a way. sigh.
getting in my parents car when at subang was worst. pure torture. the silent treatment they gave me was killing. i wished they'd scold me, scream at me, anything but be silent. parent's always do that, don't they? make you feel bad by not talking....
and so i decided, i will TRY VERY VERY HARD to not go out till so late at night. especially if it involves public transport. and i will keep a spare reload card in my phone unless i change to postpaid fast! its a good thing they didn't decide to ground me, they did think of that but later crossed that idea..and i thank them for that. so i must now prove my dependence again.
cos
"no amount of independence is mature
if i have to trouble my parents"
"no amount of fun is worth it
if my parents worry all that time"
after the interview at midvalley pulak, my 2 joker friends ( namely margaret and robin) decided to wait in hunger for me and stef to finish..that was at 9+. yes..and so we ate then. gosh, what if we had eaten and wanted to go back straightaway,,,st_p_d!!!!!! i was rushing to get to the ktm by 10pm cos the last train to subang is at 11 and its ktm ler....tau tau la. manatau the train to midvalley tergendala 3 freaking times!! the train only arrived at like wat, 10.50 something. i reached central at 11.05. needless to say, the last train gone di lar. my mind went into panic mode when i saw the sign...next train..
5.15
and to top it all i only had 2 cents in my phone, 30 cents coins in my wallet and no one had enough coins to change for a dollar note. i was stranded!!!!
i called my dad and next thing i heard was shouting. he was like " so now how?..WALK HOME LA!!'. he asked me to find a way back first before he came. and thats what i did. i went out just in time to catch the last rapid kl to subang.but since i couldn't call him, i messaged my sis to get him to call me asap. well, that took a while and when he called the bus moved off already..with me inside. And the worst thing was he said he was nearby already!.. that thought did strike when i entered the bus, but panic clouded my mind and i dismissed that innervoice.
all through the bus ride, i was either trying to hold back tears or deciding in my mind whether to prepare my defence or just let them scold. well, i did deserve it in a way. sigh.
getting in my parents car when at subang was worst. pure torture. the silent treatment they gave me was killing. i wished they'd scold me, scream at me, anything but be silent. parent's always do that, don't they? make you feel bad by not talking....
and so i decided, i will TRY VERY VERY HARD to not go out till so late at night. especially if it involves public transport. and i will keep a spare reload card in my phone unless i change to postpaid fast! its a good thing they didn't decide to ground me, they did think of that but later crossed that idea..and i thank them for that. so i must now prove my dependence again.
cos
"no amount of independence is mature
if i have to trouble my parents"
"no amount of fun is worth it
if my parents worry all that time"
Thursday, May 1, 2008
earned rm 120 for crapping an entire hour..not bad eh?.lol...
*me laughs all the way home!*
seriously, all i did was comment and give my views on whether this or that design is nicer and why sometimes...it was actually quite fun!
thank you Stef!!! luv you to bits. your kawan here appreciates you thinking of sharing the opportunity dengan ku!!
*me laughs all the way home!*
seriously, all i did was comment and give my views on whether this or that design is nicer and why sometimes...it was actually quite fun!
thank you Stef!!! luv you to bits. your kawan here appreciates you thinking of sharing the opportunity dengan ku!!
Friday, April 18, 2008
One day my mum was talking about my bro eating maggi in the evening. Me, as blur as I am obviously didn't know a thing la. so…...
Me: oohhh….he must have ate in the kitchen. I don't know anything that happens outside the study room wan.
Bro: *looks at me and shakes his head. " wrong. you don't know anything that happens besides whats in front of you."
Sis:*roles her eyes. " he was eating behind you la."
Me:????!!!!!!.........*I totally, absolutely did not realize lor. I didn't even know he was in the room, for the matter.
Mum: *shakes her head and sighs aloud
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA……….i think I just mastered the art of shutting out everything all the time, unless I make a conscious effort to look around!
Somehow, me and my younger brother have this ability to shut things out. My brother shuts his ears to the rest of the world when his reading, or when he knows your gonna ask him to do something. Me?..i just shut everything. That's why I'm labeled the blur one at home. I usually don't know whats going on and what plans the rest have made. Sometimes I don't even know we are going for a family holiday till 1 or 2 days beforehand. Or, when the music plays and anyone ask me what just played, I would usually not know. I can't even recall the tune or the lyrics of what I just 'heard'. It really becomes background music. I hear and know it's music but it just doesn't register what song's playing, even if I know the song at the back of my hand.
Me: oohhh….he must have ate in the kitchen. I don't know anything that happens outside the study room wan.
Bro: *looks at me and shakes his head. " wrong. you don't know anything that happens besides whats in front of you."
Sis:*roles her eyes. " he was eating behind you la."
Me:????!!!!!!.........*I totally, absolutely did not realize lor. I didn't even know he was in the room, for the matter.
Mum: *shakes her head and sighs aloud
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA……….i think I just mastered the art of shutting out everything all the time, unless I make a conscious effort to look around!
Somehow, me and my younger brother have this ability to shut things out. My brother shuts his ears to the rest of the world when his reading, or when he knows your gonna ask him to do something. Me?..i just shut everything. That's why I'm labeled the blur one at home. I usually don't know whats going on and what plans the rest have made. Sometimes I don't even know we are going for a family holiday till 1 or 2 days beforehand. Or, when the music plays and anyone ask me what just played, I would usually not know. I can't even recall the tune or the lyrics of what I just 'heard'. It really becomes background music. I hear and know it's music but it just doesn't register what song's playing, even if I know the song at the back of my hand.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
i finally drove out of SS 19 for the 1st time!!....... it was a nightmare for my mum, i think i scared my sis the whole half an hour, my siblings can't stop shaking their heads..and me?...am just so happy i finally drove again after....erh, 1 year hiatus?..lol
no, i didn't drive the unser. my dad borrowed his friend's saga cos his car kena curi last year..so i drove that.... haha. thank goodness i didn't scratch, dent or apa-apa la too the car.
i was suppose to trail my mum all the way to ss14 so we could send the unser to the workshop and go home with the saga. a few times it looked as though i was gonna bang my mum's car..she was like "aiyoh, she going so fast down the slope, i better go faster too" haha. fact is, i was trying to brake cos its nearing traffic light but u noe with different cars the brake also different kan, some cars press a bit only also can di....not with the saga. my sis was practically screaming her lungs out, not once but a few times sumore.
the when it turned green, i release brake la...but i couldnt balance the clutch and accelerator properly, mati-ed enjin 3 times!!! that's just at 1 traffic light . i mati-ed lotsa times more than that. even reversing out of the house, i mati so many times my mum had to drive it out for me.
when i finally got through,,then entered at 14, i didn't realise it was a one way street, i jalan saja. lol thank God there was ample space to park. my mind was already panicking cos i seriously forgotten all about the parking part when my mum asked if i was game to drive.
oh well....every new driver's first faults are always mati enjin and driving the wrong way on 1 way streets. ..and it manual ok!.*pats myself on the back* hehe.
i'm still noob k. (though already got C license wan) =)
no, i didn't drive the unser. my dad borrowed his friend's saga cos his car kena curi last year..so i drove that.... haha. thank goodness i didn't scratch, dent or apa-apa la too the car.
i was suppose to trail my mum all the way to ss14 so we could send the unser to the workshop and go home with the saga. a few times it looked as though i was gonna bang my mum's car..she was like "aiyoh, she going so fast down the slope, i better go faster too" haha. fact is, i was trying to brake cos its nearing traffic light but u noe with different cars the brake also different kan, some cars press a bit only also can di....not with the saga. my sis was practically screaming her lungs out, not once but a few times sumore.
the when it turned green, i release brake la...but i couldnt balance the clutch and accelerator properly, mati-ed enjin 3 times!!! that's just at 1 traffic light . i mati-ed lotsa times more than that. even reversing out of the house, i mati so many times my mum had to drive it out for me.
when i finally got through,,then entered at 14, i didn't realise it was a one way street, i jalan saja. lol thank God there was ample space to park. my mind was already panicking cos i seriously forgotten all about the parking part when my mum asked if i was game to drive.
oh well....every new driver's first faults are always mati enjin and driving the wrong way on 1 way streets. ..and it manual ok!.*pats myself on the back* hehe.
i'm still noob k. (though already got C license wan) =)
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
fuming mad and pissed!.......sometimes technology is just so ANNOYING. annoying's an understatement but i can't find any other word to best describe the situation..so, ANNOYING!!!!
i get kicked out every few seconds...and when i get reconnected i get kicked out again! and whats this limited conncetivity?????
and since i'm using the laptop i get kicked out more often...! my bro using the house com only gets slow connection and gets kicked out every few minutes....argh!..and all he's doing is reading manga while i'm doing my assignment!!
argh again! life IS unfair....its patience challenging. (not that i have any to begin with.)
i get kicked out every few seconds...and when i get reconnected i get kicked out again! and whats this limited conncetivity?????
and since i'm using the laptop i get kicked out more often...! my bro using the house com only gets slow connection and gets kicked out every few minutes....argh!..and all he's doing is reading manga while i'm doing my assignment!!
argh again! life IS unfair....its patience challenging. (not that i have any to begin with.)
Sunday, April 13, 2008
gosh..i don't know wether to be excited cos its holidays this 1 week or cry and groan and work like no tomorrow still. After this holidays i only have 6 official weeks of uni and 2 extra weeks if the lecturer would be oh-so-kind! And then its sem break again.
my assignment list for this holiday includes:-
1) business -company research. havn't call the other group members to distribute our workload. and sould start studying for the finals too. our seniors been telling us no one ever got an A for his class. the highest was a B....and thats so scary. i want an A!!
2) next is illustration...hmh. this wan got overdued work di. seriously i also dunnoe what i do sometimes. (k, make that most of the time) 3 weeks and still can't finish the colour pencil hatching. not just that, till now i've only done the face! and most of my classmates have started the black and white painting di....3 even finished the coloured water colour painting too and are now starting poster colour!!! they took 3 days for each. hmh...!
3) sewing- my stupid dress zipper!....haih., it was almost perfect at first. except that the invisible zipper became quite visible at one stretch. and since i had time last friday the lecturer asked me to repair that. and so i did though i reallllllyy realllly tak suka the uni's sewing machine. and needless to say i had a war with the machine and it 'ate' 3 of my needles. haih..from 9 at the starting of the sem i'm only left with 1 now. and i broke about 5 of it just last week alone...and yes, the invisible zipper is still visible albeit at a different point now, AND i dunnoe how it appeared but got extra cloth at on part too...so it just looks plain weird!!! the lecturer also laugh cos 1 side is perfectly fine, but the other is a disaster. thats not all.......i should start the pattern for my pants tooo.....most of my classmates have already started it...seriously i dunnoe why me and christina's always the last or one of the last to finish wan.
4) next, design. haih.....every class just has to have some cheong hei ppl. and so happen i was sitting opposite her that day. so each time i call the lecturer to help me...she pulak will go "miss, is this right?..so i do this, this, this ,this and this, right? then i do this, this, this and that? ok, because i have to..(whatever la)".....and she continues and repeats this procedure again and again. and each time she does this she has the nerve to look at me and say, just a minute ya! a minute my foot la...to me its just plain RUDE when you do it tooo many times. get a hint when even the lecturer roles her eyes (behind her back la). your not the only one in class ok..and its not only you who wants to get it done fast. ..and because of that i may have to go to uni one of these days to ask her to help me! i so dread going there....only bus going there is at 8 and the earliest bus to go home is 3.. i should go with christina to buy cloth one of these days tooo..ish, i dislike going to masjid jamek area..dahlah i will get sesat, and i generally think the place is just.... dislikeable? haha
5) then there's history. we're suppose to watch 'the devil wear's prada' and do character analysis on the main characters. something more interesting, haha. anyone up for an old movie? also should start writing my journal on all the topics we've covered in the past 7 weeks...more research and the lecturers like "journals should be handwritten"..so , yea.....!!!!!!!
so funny the day the lecturer announced we have a holiday assginment, Mahsa complained aloud.."but its a holiday! we're suppose to relax, not do work!.." the whole class including the lecturer erupted with laughter. but its so seriously true. technically la, holiday means relax, no?...but with this amount of homework.....nah!
my assignment list for this holiday includes:-
1) business -company research. havn't call the other group members to distribute our workload. and sould start studying for the finals too. our seniors been telling us no one ever got an A for his class. the highest was a B....and thats so scary. i want an A!!
2) next is illustration...hmh. this wan got overdued work di. seriously i also dunnoe what i do sometimes. (k, make that most of the time) 3 weeks and still can't finish the colour pencil hatching. not just that, till now i've only done the face! and most of my classmates have started the black and white painting di....3 even finished the coloured water colour painting too and are now starting poster colour!!! they took 3 days for each. hmh...!
3) sewing- my stupid dress zipper!....haih., it was almost perfect at first. except that the invisible zipper became quite visible at one stretch. and since i had time last friday the lecturer asked me to repair that. and so i did though i reallllllyy realllly tak suka the uni's sewing machine. and needless to say i had a war with the machine and it 'ate' 3 of my needles. haih..from 9 at the starting of the sem i'm only left with 1 now. and i broke about 5 of it just last week alone...and yes, the invisible zipper is still visible albeit at a different point now, AND i dunnoe how it appeared but got extra cloth at on part too...so it just looks plain weird!!! the lecturer also laugh cos 1 side is perfectly fine, but the other is a disaster. thats not all.......i should start the pattern for my pants tooo.....most of my classmates have already started it...seriously i dunnoe why me and christina's always the last or one of the last to finish wan.
4) next, design. haih.....every class just has to have some cheong hei ppl. and so happen i was sitting opposite her that day. so each time i call the lecturer to help me...she pulak will go "miss, is this right?..so i do this, this, this ,this and this, right? then i do this, this, this and that? ok, because i have to..(whatever la)".....and she continues and repeats this procedure again and again. and each time she does this she has the nerve to look at me and say, just a minute ya! a minute my foot la...to me its just plain RUDE when you do it tooo many times. get a hint when even the lecturer roles her eyes (behind her back la). your not the only one in class ok..and its not only you who wants to get it done fast. ..and because of that i may have to go to uni one of these days to ask her to help me! i so dread going there....only bus going there is at 8 and the earliest bus to go home is 3.. i should go with christina to buy cloth one of these days tooo..ish, i dislike going to masjid jamek area..dahlah i will get sesat, and i generally think the place is just.... dislikeable? haha
5) then there's history. we're suppose to watch 'the devil wear's prada' and do character analysis on the main characters. something more interesting, haha. anyone up for an old movie? also should start writing my journal on all the topics we've covered in the past 7 weeks...more research and the lecturers like "journals should be handwritten"..so , yea.....!!!!!!!
so funny the day the lecturer announced we have a holiday assginment, Mahsa complained aloud.."but its a holiday! we're suppose to relax, not do work!.." the whole class including the lecturer erupted with laughter. but its so seriously true. technically la, holiday means relax, no?...but with this amount of homework.....nah!
Sunday, April 6, 2008
Monday, March 31, 2008
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Sunday, March 23, 2008
aiks.........kena tagged by sheryiin..
Instructions: Remove ONE question from below, and add in your personal question, make it a total of 20 questions, then tag 8 people in your list, list them out at the end of this post. Notify them in their chat box that he/she has been tagged. Whoever does the tag will have blessings from all...(sure anot?)
1. Who is your all-time inspiration?
who ar?....lets change it to what....hehe. anything and everything pretty?
2. Have you given your first kiss away?
no lar.
3. If you were to be stranded on a deserted island, who are the 3 blog buddies you would take with you? Why?
hmh..
i) margaret!! monkey joker...ur so funny, definitely bring you lar to keep me company..........bwahaha
ii) lydia..cos we can talk for hours and not run out of topics to talk bout. hahaha
iii) melanie......by then u'll have NS experience!! =)
4. Where is the place that you want to go the most?
for now, it's korea, the scenary in those dramas are just so enticing. i'm generally not a scenary but this is exceptionnally nice.
5. If you can have a dream come true, what would it be?
to be TALLER!!!! duh...........
6. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?-
yeah, i've seen quite a number mysel.
7. What are you afraid to lose the most now?
my friends.
8. If you win $1 million, what would you do?
buy car!!!!!! then shopping, and go eat at places i'd normally can't afford and the rest keep la.
9. If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
nope. guys should make the first move. haha ...be a guy!!
10.List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you.
talks more now that i'm no longer her cg leader..haha, but she's nice and really hardworking!
11. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
a good looking christian, lean guy, right brainer too, must be amusing at least to me, and builds me up.
12. Which type of person do you hate the most?
people who talk secrets they don't want me to hear, in front of me!!!
13. What is your ambition?
be a famous, succesful designer?
14. If you have faults, would you rather the people around you point out to you or would you rather they keep quiet?
tell me!! nothing hurts more than knowing i'm being talked about behind my back.
15. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
honestly, my friends.
16) Are you a shopaholic ?
yup, and quite impulsive at times. but mostly indecisive..sighs*
17. erh.........who created this tag thing anyway??!!!
18. If you have a chance. Which part of your character you would like to change?
to not go blank all the time!!!
19. Name a song which got stuck in your head first thing this morning, and you can't help but keep it. Are you happy about it?
all american rejects-straight jacket feeling. a visit to carissa's blog got me addicted to most of the songs on her playlist..including this!!
20. What do you wish to have now?
my own room with a walk in wardrobe and more clothes, shoes and bags to fill it, a...... forget it. i want a magic wand that'll give me everything i want not just now, but forever!!! hehehehe
i tag:
margaret, stefanie, melanie, lydia, rachelle, sharon, roxanne, and eunice!
Instructions: Remove ONE question from below, and add in your personal question, make it a total of 20 questions, then tag 8 people in your list, list them out at the end of this post. Notify them in their chat box that he/she has been tagged. Whoever does the tag will have blessings from all...(sure anot?)
1. Who is your all-time inspiration?
who ar?....lets change it to what....hehe. anything and everything pretty?
2. Have you given your first kiss away?
no lar.
3. If you were to be stranded on a deserted island, who are the 3 blog buddies you would take with you? Why?
hmh..
i) margaret!! monkey joker...ur so funny, definitely bring you lar to keep me company..........bwahaha
ii) lydia..cos we can talk for hours and not run out of topics to talk bout. hahaha
iii) melanie......by then u'll have NS experience!! =)
4. Where is the place that you want to go the most?
for now, it's korea, the scenary in those dramas are just so enticing. i'm generally not a scenary but this is exceptionnally nice.
5. If you can have a dream come true, what would it be?
to be TALLER!!!! duh...........
6. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?-
yeah, i've seen quite a number mysel.
7. What are you afraid to lose the most now?
my friends.
8. If you win $1 million, what would you do?
buy car!!!!!! then shopping, and go eat at places i'd normally can't afford and the rest keep la.
9. If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
nope. guys should make the first move. haha ...be a guy!!
10.List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you.
talks more now that i'm no longer her cg leader..haha, but she's nice and really hardworking!
11. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
a good looking christian, lean guy, right brainer too, must be amusing at least to me, and builds me up.
12. Which type of person do you hate the most?
people who talk secrets they don't want me to hear, in front of me!!!
13. What is your ambition?
be a famous, succesful designer?
14. If you have faults, would you rather the people around you point out to you or would you rather they keep quiet?
tell me!! nothing hurts more than knowing i'm being talked about behind my back.
15. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
honestly, my friends.
16) Are you a shopaholic ?
yup, and quite impulsive at times. but mostly indecisive..sighs*
17. erh.........who created this tag thing anyway??!!!
18. If you have a chance. Which part of your character you would like to change?
to not go blank all the time!!!
19. Name a song which got stuck in your head first thing this morning, and you can't help but keep it. Are you happy about it?
all american rejects-straight jacket feeling. a visit to carissa's blog got me addicted to most of the songs on her playlist..including this!!
20. What do you wish to have now?
my own room with a walk in wardrobe and more clothes, shoes and bags to fill it, a...... forget it. i want a magic wand that'll give me everything i want not just now, but forever!!! hehehehe
i tag:
margaret, stefanie, melanie, lydia, rachelle, sharon, roxanne, and eunice!
Sunday, March 16, 2008
more about my momental memory loss.........2 weeks ago, i woke up on time, dressed up as usual only taking my swweeet time, somehow forgetting that the bus leaves at 8.15. i went in my mum's car only realising then that its already 8.13! and i just left the house. i frantically called my fren to ask the drvier to wait, but no, the driver refused. and so i reached just in time to see the bus move from its spot. next thing i knew, it was a wild goose chase between the bus driver and my mum tailing him directly behind, honking him to stop. at first i thought i could run to catch him since he stopped a sec at sjmc. but that didn't work and i ended up running a few steps bahind him like a mad girl. ....so embarassing.. i hope no one i know saw me! thank goodness i arrived at the sunway stop in time to get on the bus. not without bouts of laughing from my friends though.
then last monday, i forgotten to bring my asignment to do in that 6 hrs before class. i placed it on my table the night before, while packing. but somehow, when i brought my bag to the front a few minutes later, that big file on my table decided to hide from my eyes. it slipped my mind, and i didn't see it. i only realised it when i reached the bus stop the next morning.
again my brain decides to play tricks on me. yesterday i thought my violin class is at 3pm instead of 3,30. i went in confidently, and upon seeing his actual 3 pm student which arrived later than me, he questioned. and i confidently answered 'my time is 3'. haha..big joke.....now he'll probably laugh at that too for the next few weeks till he finds a new joke. who knew my name could be a source of laughter too.....ai, why your eye like that wan? hahaha
then last monday, i forgotten to bring my asignment to do in that 6 hrs before class. i placed it on my table the night before, while packing. but somehow, when i brought my bag to the front a few minutes later, that big file on my table decided to hide from my eyes. it slipped my mind, and i didn't see it. i only realised it when i reached the bus stop the next morning.
again my brain decides to play tricks on me. yesterday i thought my violin class is at 3pm instead of 3,30. i went in confidently, and upon seeing his actual 3 pm student which arrived later than me, he questioned. and i confidently answered 'my time is 3'. haha..big joke.....now he'll probably laugh at that too for the next few weeks till he finds a new joke. who knew my name could be a source of laughter too.....ai, why your eye like that wan? hahaha
barely 3 weeks of uni and its just crazy! asignments are pilling, the excitement rising, yet the mood dampens day by day. yes, i'm finally gonna design my own garments, and yes, i feel more like a professional artist now. but the higher my asignments pile, the more moody i become, the less i want to finish it, let alone start doing. such a procrastinator.
i'm jealous too. my friends can still afford to relax, but i have to slug day and night just trying to finish it. and i already have a late submission. gosh.......!
as i sit here writing this post, i'm supposed to be doing pencil hatching. but i take forever. 1 whole day for a sleeve is no joke. and i have to pass this up on monday. the ever impending thought that my work is just not nice, not perfect enough is reason to blame. having stef's work as example has its good and bad. my classmates saw that gorgeous piece of work, so did my lecturers. they now think i'm good. kinda hard living up to that expectation, aint it?
that aside, i still have 30 sketches to design. read: i need ideas desperately! its due tuesday;a dress pattern block to complete, of which i've forgotten half the instructions. sigh....i've been having memory problems lately.
not to mention, i still wanna go out with deb and the rest of the gang this week, since its deb's last week of hols. with that amount of work??
i'm jealous too. my friends can still afford to relax, but i have to slug day and night just trying to finish it. and i already have a late submission. gosh.......!
as i sit here writing this post, i'm supposed to be doing pencil hatching. but i take forever. 1 whole day for a sleeve is no joke. and i have to pass this up on monday. the ever impending thought that my work is just not nice, not perfect enough is reason to blame. having stef's work as example has its good and bad. my classmates saw that gorgeous piece of work, so did my lecturers. they now think i'm good. kinda hard living up to that expectation, aint it?
that aside, i still have 30 sketches to design. read: i need ideas desperately! its due tuesday;a dress pattern block to complete, of which i've forgotten half the instructions. sigh....i've been having memory problems lately.
not to mention, i still wanna go out with deb and the rest of the gang this week, since its deb's last week of hols. with that amount of work??
Sunday, March 9, 2008
since when did i care bout politics? bout elections and ministers, government and opposition and what nots? hmh...my parents are. everyone around me is, surprisingly even my close friends are. guess it rubbed on me. as much as i don't like it, its scary in a way too. especially when every few minutes i hear the opposition winning, or the coalition's top guns losing. i'm shivering already!!!! what would happen to us? would our everyday life be still what we've come to know as normal? what if......? gosh, i don't even wanna think about it anymore.
i'm as unsettled as the waves of a roaring sea? like a tornado forming in my brain. i can't think straight, and i can't do work.
no, i'm not thinking bout the polls. no wait. i don't even know what i'm thinking or what i should be thinking. its all jumbled up. even simple things like which assignment i should start with seems like an impossible task. what is wrong with me?!
all's not well.
i'm not clear what i'm suppose to fill my concept board with. pictures of what? kate beckinsale only? how am i going to find enough interesting pictures to fill that A3 board?. what is a concept board anyway?
i don't know what outfit to design, what material to use. was at a loss when i went to kamdar on friday. i was totally blank on what to find. i give up so easily when i don't see what i imagine!!
again i start to think. do i really want to do this? i don't like sewing and i shiver at the prospect of having to sew my own design in just a matter of a few weeks. to top it, i hear that we'll be having a fashion show for our designs too at the end of the semester, that's like what....3 months?
exciting, yes. anxious and frustrated too.
i'm as unsettled as the waves of a roaring sea? like a tornado forming in my brain. i can't think straight, and i can't do work.
no, i'm not thinking bout the polls. no wait. i don't even know what i'm thinking or what i should be thinking. its all jumbled up. even simple things like which assignment i should start with seems like an impossible task. what is wrong with me?!
all's not well.
i'm not clear what i'm suppose to fill my concept board with. pictures of what? kate beckinsale only? how am i going to find enough interesting pictures to fill that A3 board?. what is a concept board anyway?
i don't know what outfit to design, what material to use. was at a loss when i went to kamdar on friday. i was totally blank on what to find. i give up so easily when i don't see what i imagine!!
again i start to think. do i really want to do this? i don't like sewing and i shiver at the prospect of having to sew my own design in just a matter of a few weeks. to top it, i hear that we'll be having a fashion show for our designs too at the end of the semester, that's like what....3 months?
exciting, yes. anxious and frustrated too.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Scream!!!!!!!......shattered to a million pieces. Like a bomb blast. Scattered. Unable to regain its form, unable to function, rendered useless by the mighty blow. Like a bolt of lightning screeching through, screams thundering, clouding any audible voice left. The intensity? magnificently magnified with the thoughts and images rushing through, not stopping, not allowing even a glimpse. What madness! Wild, insane, the unthinkable, the thoughts going berserk, like wires going haywire. Brownian's movement in the human core.
One secret revealed, and blown out of proportion.
One secret revealed, and blown out of proportion.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Again,
Again,
The year replays its tune
The somber song
For one is leaving.
Again,
I see hands raised
Moving from left to right
Waving in quiet agony
While yet others enclosed in a hug.
Again,
The sounds return
The people crying
Their feets scurrying
To hurry before the gates closes
The planes……the noise!
and then silence……...
Gone are they who once keep us near
Our laughter's now trapped in 2 letters
Gone are the shoulders to cry on
Our ears now resolved to typing
A substantial portrayal with no feelings and warmth
For none replaces the space you left behind.
Sunday, February 24, 2008
29th Jan 2008
haha yes i know its soooo long ago. so?................lol
this is the crazy day me and my uni frens went to do a shok sendiri punya photoshoot at......UNI...of all places..hahahaha, and thenafter adjourn to pyramid's The Magical Theatre for Deb's bday party. And our dear kawan, margaret forgot to bring her makeup kit and Deb's present!...haha. that explains why our faces look so bare in the photos:
the rest of pics..will soon be posted in erh...facebook or friendster, maybe. haha, see lah.
this is the crazy day me and my uni frens went to do a shok sendiri punya photoshoot at......UNI...of all places..hahahaha, and thenafter adjourn to pyramid's The Magical Theatre for Deb's bday party. And our dear kawan, margaret forgot to bring her makeup kit and Deb's present!...haha. that explains why our faces look so bare in the photos:
the rest of pics..will soon be posted in erh...facebook or friendster, maybe. haha, see lah.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
watch my face
turn black with anger,
eyes starring hard
tears refrained,
mouth shut tight
quenching words
that'll send sparks a flame.
it seems,
each turn and bend i choose
is wrong to you.
you guide,
and confuse me even more.
you tell me to learn
yet,
you pull me down
and crush my momental success
the impending harshness,
your words,
your ideals for everything
makes this maze impossible.
turn black with anger,
eyes starring hard
tears refrained,
mouth shut tight
quenching words
that'll send sparks a flame.
it seems,
each turn and bend i choose
is wrong to you.
you guide,
and confuse me even more.
you tell me to learn
yet,
you pull me down
and crush my momental success
the impending harshness,
your words,
your ideals for everything
makes this maze impossible.
Monday, February 18, 2008
Tomorrow I pay my fees, next week I start.
Suddenly going back to uni seems so strange, so alien. Even the thought of it seems weird. After 2 months, past the new year and still 2 months more. How would the classmates be? Would the lecturers still be the same? The Plaza, Wings, the Library. Would I still frequent those places?
Would my current bff's still remain, unchanged? I hope we do=) What about Padi? And Old Town? ….i smell white coffee……
Oh, NO! waking up at 7 everyday!! And the coming back. I hope I get to go back at 3 everyday. Wouldn't it be perfect if they'd schedule for a bus at 4?! It's not fun staying in that out-of-nowhere black concrete jail till 6! Especially with no one to grumble and laugh with. The HORROR!
3+ months of holidays. The prospect of sleeping till past 9 on most day is BLISS; till I wake up and crack my brains figuring out what to do the rest of the day.
Suddenly going back to uni seems so strange, so alien. Even the thought of it seems weird. After 2 months, past the new year and still 2 months more. How would the classmates be? Would the lecturers still be the same? The Plaza, Wings, the Library. Would I still frequent those places?
Would my current bff's still remain, unchanged? I hope we do=) What about Padi? And Old Town? ….i smell white coffee……
Oh, NO! waking up at 7 everyday!! And the coming back. I hope I get to go back at 3 everyday. Wouldn't it be perfect if they'd schedule for a bus at 4?! It's not fun staying in that out-of-nowhere black concrete jail till 6! Especially with no one to grumble and laugh with. The HORROR!
3+ months of holidays. The prospect of sleeping till past 9 on most day is BLISS; till I wake up and crack my brains figuring out what to do the rest of the day.
Friday, February 15, 2008
Where's your heart?
Where's your passion?
Where's your desire?
I question you!
Take your stand
Take your place
Your not here forever
Hone the skills
Gain the experience
Now get out
Put your hands to the plough
Buck up or lose out!
Where's your passion?
Where's your desire?
I question you!
Take your stand
Take your place
Your not here forever
Hone the skills
Gain the experience
Now get out
Put your hands to the plough
Buck up or lose out!
gosh...some of these peoples design are sooooo nice. so talented! really an eye opener. shaking me to reality!
Thursday, February 14, 2008
You chose to deviate
You took this path
Your decision was rash
You know it
Your choice was plenty
Advise were many
You chose not to listen
You jumped to conclusions
You hardened your heart
You limit yourself
Why regret now?
Why wish the months retrace its days?
Why hope for second chances?
What's done, done
Why the blame?
Its your mistake
Why the tears?
Straighten up, you sour face
The journey's too short
Don't look back
The candle is dying
Get up, Move on
Don't complain
I won't sympathize
Don't give up
Your stronger than that
Don't cry in my sight
Don't thug on my robe
Don't bribe me
I won't buy it
The life is yours
Its yours to care
Its mine to guide
Choices I provide
You decide
You stick by it
I'll pull you through
Your hands in mine
I won't let go
You took this path
Your decision was rash
You know it
Your choice was plenty
Advise were many
You chose not to listen
You jumped to conclusions
You hardened your heart
You limit yourself
Why regret now?
Why wish the months retrace its days?
Why hope for second chances?
What's done, done
Why the blame?
Its your mistake
Why the tears?
Straighten up, you sour face
The journey's too short
Don't look back
The candle is dying
Get up, Move on
Don't complain
I won't sympathize
Don't give up
Your stronger than that
Don't cry in my sight
Don't thug on my robe
Don't bribe me
I won't buy it
The life is yours
Its yours to care
Its mine to guide
Choices I provide
You decide
You stick by it
I'll pull you through
Your hands in mine
I won't let go
Friday, February 1, 2008
3 months tooooo long.
what have i been doing all this while? lets see
hols started in mid nov....so i'll start recalling from then.
hmh.........
the day i passed up every single assignment i had, my mum left for sabah with the rest of my siblings except my sister la. aand...me and my friends did not go to uni at the same time, so i did not get to hang out with them on the last day =(......so, me being the 'kuai lui', returned home to an empty house and 'enjoyed' the rest of the day watching tv and dvds. pathethic kan?
then the next few days were none less torturing. the earlier i wake, the more energy i would need just thinking of how i would spend my time. when i was busy with assignments, i had a whole mental list of what i wanted to do during the hols. but when hols actually came, i, being the lazy bum, suddenly just didn't feel like doing anything anymore.
since i couldn't figure out what to do, my parents decided they'd take advantage of my time and use it for their work. so, i had to go everywhere, anywhere, running THEIR errands. well, at least i get paid. hahahahaha
then in december, things started picking up. my friends too started their hols, friends came back from outstation= hanging out!!! then came camp, in mid dec. and my cousins after that. too bad my sis didn't have a hol then....no shopping kaki=( and it feels weird to not shop with my sis. but i still had fun going out with my cousins. gosh, they're SOOOOO tall! dread standing beside them.cis, geram! lol
next was christmas....nothing different from other years tho', and new year......haih......why do we not do anything special, memorable, different on these days?? oh there was the holidays with thc cousins at camerons...funnnnn!
jan 2008: back to square 1. but now with my mum around....can't go around doing what i like in peace. every few minutes there will be the resounding voice calling me to do this and that and everything else. not that i do though...not so kuai anymore.
but, thanks for equally bored friends...we decided to do something crazy! one week we stayed over at stef's, the next week at mine. we can do nothing but talk for 4 hours in that same shop and yet continue again for another 8 hours later in the night!! then stef came up with an impromptu idea: go do a photoshoot at uni! of all places..haha. but thats what we did on tuesday. we even asked marg to ponteng one day of kerja just to be with us...such 'loving' friends we are. and ponteng she did..MONKEY JOKER!!!
then that night we went and celebrate deb's b'day! i absolutely love The Magical Theatre, except that it left my hair smelling like smoke. eewwwww.......................that was 29 jan already
what have i been doing all this while? lets see
hols started in mid nov....so i'll start recalling from then.
hmh.........
the day i passed up every single assignment i had, my mum left for sabah with the rest of my siblings except my sister la. aand...me and my friends did not go to uni at the same time, so i did not get to hang out with them on the last day =(......so, me being the 'kuai lui', returned home to an empty house and 'enjoyed' the rest of the day watching tv and dvds. pathethic kan?
then the next few days were none less torturing. the earlier i wake, the more energy i would need just thinking of how i would spend my time. when i was busy with assignments, i had a whole mental list of what i wanted to do during the hols. but when hols actually came, i, being the lazy bum, suddenly just didn't feel like doing anything anymore.
since i couldn't figure out what to do, my parents decided they'd take advantage of my time and use it for their work. so, i had to go everywhere, anywhere, running THEIR errands. well, at least i get paid. hahahahaha
then in december, things started picking up. my friends too started their hols, friends came back from outstation= hanging out!!! then came camp, in mid dec. and my cousins after that. too bad my sis didn't have a hol then....no shopping kaki=( and it feels weird to not shop with my sis. but i still had fun going out with my cousins. gosh, they're SOOOOO tall! dread standing beside them.cis, geram! lol
next was christmas....nothing different from other years tho', and new year......haih......why do we not do anything special, memorable, different on these days?? oh there was the holidays with thc cousins at camerons...funnnnn!
jan 2008: back to square 1. but now with my mum around....can't go around doing what i like in peace. every few minutes there will be the resounding voice calling me to do this and that and everything else. not that i do though...not so kuai anymore.
but, thanks for equally bored friends...we decided to do something crazy! one week we stayed over at stef's, the next week at mine. we can do nothing but talk for 4 hours in that same shop and yet continue again for another 8 hours later in the night!! then stef came up with an impromptu idea: go do a photoshoot at uni! of all places..haha. but thats what we did on tuesday. we even asked marg to ponteng one day of kerja just to be with us...such 'loving' friends we are. and ponteng she did..MONKEY JOKER!!!
then that night we went and celebrate deb's b'day! i absolutely love The Magical Theatre, except that it left my hair smelling like smoke. eewwwww.......................that was 29 jan already
now Feb, CNY!!!! yeah, this year was Good! all because the 4 days of school holidays the government gave my lil' siblings was well spent visiting people and collecting ang pows..wahahahahhah and because I still had hols, i went with the remnants of the FORM 6-ers to visit our friends. ish, why your hols so short wan? tradisi tak dapat dicompletekan. sigh.
there's still my uni friends!! thank God for them, such lovable darlings. went visiting some of them and stayed over at stef's yet again...haha. no reason why.
and 25th uni's starting!!!
SLOW DANCE
Have you ever watched kids
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Do you run through each day
On the fly?
When you ask ‘How are you?’
Do you hear the reply?
When the day is done
Do you lie in your bed
With the next hundred chores
Running through your head?
You'd better slow down
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Ever told your child,
We'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste,
Not see his sorrow?
Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time
To call and say,'Hi' ?
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
When you run so fast to get somewhere
You miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It is like an unopened gift....
Thrown away.
Life is not a race.
Do take it slower
Hear the music
Before the song is over.
got this from an email......i think its beautiful and so true.
honestly, do we even bother to stop and admire the beauty of God's creation? not really, right? we just have so much on our minds, sometimes we look past everything and everyone else, we zone of far away, delving straight into our business. then we look back a few months or years and wonder what happen to she,who used to be our close friend.
Have you ever watched kids
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Do you run through each day
On the fly?
When you ask ‘How are you?’
Do you hear the reply?
When the day is done
Do you lie in your bed
With the next hundred chores
Running through your head?
You'd better slow down
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Ever told your child,
We'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste,
Not see his sorrow?
Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time
To call and say,'Hi' ?
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
When you run so fast to get somewhere
You miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It is like an unopened gift....
Thrown away.
Life is not a race.
Do take it slower
Hear the music
Before the song is over.
got this from an email......i think its beautiful and so true.
honestly, do we even bother to stop and admire the beauty of God's creation? not really, right? we just have so much on our minds, sometimes we look past everything and everyone else, we zone of far away, delving straight into our business. then we look back a few months or years and wonder what happen to she,who used to be our close friend.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
The BIG P
Parents. = irritating
To me.
How much of us do they know? How much of them do we know?
I always wanted to personally sign my parents up for ‘parenting teens and young adults’ courses. In my opinion, they really need it. Didn’t they ever look at their parents and say ‘I never want to do that to my child’? or are they just too caught up with work they can’t see past their parents parenting methods?
Don’t they ever wonder why all their scolding’s and naggings don’t make us any better? Don’t they ever stop and wonder whether their parenting methods are effective?
How about their toooo strict rules? Some too outdated to be enforced.
You have a problem with me sleeping at past 12 everyday? Why must I wake up at 8am? Why must you plan things for me to do? why won’t you let me go out at night?
You say I rebel?......poof...why don’t YOU stop and figure out why I do wat i do?
Better yet,
Why don’t you just LEAVE ME TO DO WHAT I LIKE AT WHATEVER TIME I DECIDE? Whose life is it? Definitely not yours.
It’s not like I want you to completely get your hook of me. All I want is a little space for me to breathe. Yes, you read me right. I think you’re suffocating me.
I’ll still let you control how much time I spend out of the house and in the house. I let you control what I can eat and what I can refuse to eat, which basically is nothing. I let you control my allowance, it’s your money and I respect that.
Why do you want to control my finer things in life at present? No where is it written that we must sleep before 12 and wake up by 8. Let me sleep whatever time I like. Fine if you want me to wake up early, 9 is still bright. Do not bother how much sleep I get, it’s not like I’d complain and be a zombie whole day. I know you care, but don’t force your way of living down my throat.
Do not complain if I do not do the things you planned for me, they’re seldom anything I have in mind. I know what I should brush up on. I don’t need you to tell me that. Just let me do it when I want to. It does not matter how much of it I do in a day. It’s my holidays and I’ll work at my own pace.
The masterpiece, the heart and the soul are all a parcel. Anything done without the complete power of 3 proves futile.
And for once, be quiet when we talk. Give us a chance to state our defence. Don’t jump to conclusions and don’t make assumptions. It’s my greatest dislike about you. Remember, you’re not always right. Neither is anything you didn’t do during your childhood, wrong. We’re just different. And we live in different eras. Peeking out of your shell is good once in awhile.
I love you, but I long for my space. You can’t keep me forever.
Parents. = irritating
To me.
How much of us do they know? How much of them do we know?
I always wanted to personally sign my parents up for ‘parenting teens and young adults’ courses. In my opinion, they really need it. Didn’t they ever look at their parents and say ‘I never want to do that to my child’? or are they just too caught up with work they can’t see past their parents parenting methods?
Don’t they ever wonder why all their scolding’s and naggings don’t make us any better? Don’t they ever stop and wonder whether their parenting methods are effective?
How about their toooo strict rules? Some too outdated to be enforced.
You have a problem with me sleeping at past 12 everyday? Why must I wake up at 8am? Why must you plan things for me to do? why won’t you let me go out at night?
You say I rebel?......poof...why don’t YOU stop and figure out why I do wat i do?
Better yet,
Why don’t you just LEAVE ME TO DO WHAT I LIKE AT WHATEVER TIME I DECIDE? Whose life is it? Definitely not yours.
It’s not like I want you to completely get your hook of me. All I want is a little space for me to breathe. Yes, you read me right. I think you’re suffocating me.
I’ll still let you control how much time I spend out of the house and in the house. I let you control what I can eat and what I can refuse to eat, which basically is nothing. I let you control my allowance, it’s your money and I respect that.
Why do you want to control my finer things in life at present? No where is it written that we must sleep before 12 and wake up by 8. Let me sleep whatever time I like. Fine if you want me to wake up early, 9 is still bright. Do not bother how much sleep I get, it’s not like I’d complain and be a zombie whole day. I know you care, but don’t force your way of living down my throat.
Do not complain if I do not do the things you planned for me, they’re seldom anything I have in mind. I know what I should brush up on. I don’t need you to tell me that. Just let me do it when I want to. It does not matter how much of it I do in a day. It’s my holidays and I’ll work at my own pace.
The masterpiece, the heart and the soul are all a parcel. Anything done without the complete power of 3 proves futile.
And for once, be quiet when we talk. Give us a chance to state our defence. Don’t jump to conclusions and don’t make assumptions. It’s my greatest dislike about you. Remember, you’re not always right. Neither is anything you didn’t do during your childhood, wrong. We’re just different. And we live in different eras. Peeking out of your shell is good once in awhile.
I love you, but I long for my space. You can’t keep me forever.
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